Postpartum & Welcoming Motherhood
My postpartum life was like a roller coaster, and it came with a few surprises. I’m sharing five unexpected postpartum symptoms I experienced in the first three months after giving birth, and my perspective on motherhood so far.
I understand that every woman is different. I’m sharing this postpartum experience because being a first time mom can be challenging, but it is not often shared. It is as important to care for our wellbeing as much as we care for our babies.
outfits:
ASTR the label Sonnet dress in white. Similar here
Lucien is wearing Wilson & Frenchy knitted overall
PhotoGRAphed by Lena Lim
1. Post-baby Body
I thought after giving birth my stomach would deflate like a balloon, and my body shape would go back to my pre pregnancy days immediately.
But I was still bloated, looking like I was 6 months pregnant when I left the hospital, which was 2 days after giving birth. It took about 6-8 weeks to lose some weight and for my stomach to become flatter. One of the reasons is the uterus takes time to shrink. You could see my postpartum belly showing in the photos here, taken one month after giving birth.
I lost most of the pregnancy weight gained, 10 kg of 15 kg, in the second month, mainly by cutting down junk food and unhealthy snacks, breastfeeding and going for walks with the baby. I am at the end of third month postpartum, still working on my fitness and getting back in shape.
2. Vaginal discharge
After giving birth, the body gets rid of the blood and tissues in the uterus. It was like having medium to light flow period over 6 to 8 weeks. I was not expecting that it would take that long. I didn’t experience any belly cramps.
As I mentioned on the previous post, I experienced second degree tear down there. I was scared every time I went to the toilet that I might break the stitches. It was a bit sore every now and then in the first few weeks, so I took Panadol and Ibuprofen three times a day for month, as per the mid-wife recommendation. Thankfully, it was fully recovered within 8 weeks with no infection or any complication.
3. Physically sensitive
When I got home from the hospital and the adrenaline from giving birth was gone, my body started to feel sensitive all over. I felt lethargic from breastfeeding, waking up at nights to feed him, soothe him when he cries, while my body was recovering. I was warned of all of these but to experience it myself was a different story. I only had some energy to go for walks two weeks after giving birth.
Due to COVID lockdown, our families weren't able to visit to help out . I underestimated how much support was needed to look after a newborn. Fortunately, my husband did all the house chores. I silently wished that my family were here to take care of Lucien even for a couple of hours each day, so I could slot in some ‘me’ time exercising, and doing other things aside from looking after Lucien. Three months being a mom, I'm still finding the groove and day-to-day rhythm.
4. Painful Breastfeeding
I did not know that breastfeeding could be quite painful at the beginning. My breasts felt tender and sore when they were full. My nipples were dry and cracked at the start too. It took about a week to heal. Applying nipple cream helped soothing and healing them. If I knew about the nipple cream earlier, I’d apply it right after I gave birth. I would recommend Lansinoh nipple cream. It did get easier, less awkward and painful overtime. Fortunately, I did not experience mastitis (blocked milk duct).
I also did not expect how demanding nursing was. I needed to be readily available anytime. Sometimes, I felt all I did was nursing him all day. Finding comfortable nursing bras and clothes was essential. I lived in a kimono wrap when I am at home, and I’m loving one from Nothing Fits But. I will share chic nursing and bump friendly dresses on another post.
5. Emotionally sensitive
As I mentioned earlier, I was overwhelmed with joy the moment Lucien was born. But it was not an endless joy and perfection once we got home. There is a lot of advice on looking after newborns but it still required trial and error to see what works for Lucien. I did not know postpartum hormones could drive me crazy. There were times I broke down and cried when he was fussy but I did not know why, when he was so clingy but I was feeling lethargic and wanted some alone time or a little freedom. I was frustrated when he did not want to sleep at night. I doubted that I could go through it all. Other times, I adored him so much when he smiled at me and looked at me as if he understood what I felt. I could not truly enjoy and appreciate Lucien till the last couple of weeks, he was almost three months old. Everyone says it would only get easier and babies grow really fast.
Before giving birth to Lucien, I had never imagined myself being a mother. Mainly, it was because I was a little apprehensive about giving up my time and focus, or rather life and dream to raising a child. Unexpectedly, I have not lost motivation for my dream and career goals. In fact, having this baby motivates me to be the best version of myself, to cast away any cynicism, to find grit and faith in pursuing my dream and goals. It will take time to find a balance between motherhood and time for exercising, getting back to work and fashion projects.
I hope this article does not scare you away from motherhood. If you are a soon-to-be or new mom, I’d like to let you know that we are all in this together.